The Shadow Girl
by Lilybookworm13
Summary: My sister compared me to a shadow. She's right. I have to be like a shadow to do what I do. No one would suspect me. Most people don't take a second glance at me. I'm just the girl who's sister volunteered for the Hunger Games. I'm Chryssie, I should have volunteered.
1. Chapter 1

I woke up long before dawn as I always did. Katniss was still asleep, she would wake in an hour or so and Prim was missing from between us, she was lying with our mother, probably terrified about this afternoon.

I got up and dressed silently before I grabbed my bag and left the house. I felt like I was the only one in the district awake. That's how I like it.

I want to make one thing clear: I don't steal. I borrow but I don't give things back.

I slipped along the paths towards the peacekeeper building. I looked around and walked towards the window that was open. It was the kitchen window, exactly where I needed to go. I crouched down and looked through the gap. Every shelf was brimming with food, it wasn't fair.

I glance around again and then slipped through the window. I grabbed some sort of cake off one shelf and shoved it in my bag, there was a bowl sitting on the table, full of fruit. I opened the flap on my bag and put in three oranges and two pears. I crept around looking for something else, something to cheer us up after the reaping. I saw a packet of cookies in a cupboard and I grabbed them as there was a noise on the floor above me. I rushed to the window to escape before I was caught. I hopped out and slipped back into the darkness of the streets.

I ran to the meadow and walked beside the electric fence. It was off, as it usually was. I slipped between the wire. I ran up to the hill where I knew Katniss and Gale would be.

" Chryssie does." I heard Katniss say, as I pushed my way through the berry bushes that surrounded the clearing. I pulled two oranges from my bag and stood behind them.

" Happy Hunger Games," I said, throwing one to each of them.

" Where did you borrow these from?" Katniss asked.

" The peacekeepers," I said, sitting down. Katniss handed me half of her orange and I smiled.

" Are you crazy?" Gale asked.

" Possibly," I said. " Anyway, you were talking about me. Why?"

" Your sister says she never wants kids," Gale said.

" But you do," Katniss said.

" Sure, and then before they turn twelve I'll kill them so they'll never have to be in the reaping," I said.

" No you wouldn't," she said. " So, what do you want to do?"

" I don't mind," I said. It would be fishing or gathering because I can't hunt to save my life.

" Let's fish at the lake and get something nice for tonight," Gale said.

" I think animals hate me," I said, as Katniss got her third fish.

" You have to wait," she said.

" I've tried that. I think I'll get some berries and leave the fishing to you," I said, putting my pole on the ground and standing up.

An hour later Katniss and Gale have ten fish and I have a lot of berries. Then it's time to trade which I usually enjoy, but I know that I had no time.

" I'm going to go and get ready, so we're not both rushing," I said to Katniss, as we entered the Seam. " See you in the square." I looked at Gale and smiled and in reply he nodded. As I walked home I sighed, he was never going to realise. Was he?

* * *

><p>I stood in our upstairs room and looked in the cracked mirror. I was clean, it was strange to see my skin with no dirt or grim. I was wearing an old dress of Mum's that I had worn to the last three reapings. It was green, but it had faded so much that you wouldn't know.<p>

I put my hair in a single braid down my back and tied it with a bit of string.

I don't recognise the girl staring back at me. Too clean. Too grown up. She's seen too much. Her life's been hard. She hardly sleeps for worrying. But it's the same grey eyes and dark blonde hair, the eyes and hair that confuse people. Seam or Town?

I turned away from the mirror and sat on the bed to put my shoes on. They let me down, black boots, the only shoes that fit me.

" Chryssie?" Prim walked in and looked at me. " Were you scared?" I finished tying my lace and walked over to her. I hugged her tightly and placed my head on top of hers.

" Terrified, and I still am and I always will be," I whispered.

" But you only have two left," she said.

" But Katniss has three and you have seven. Then you finish and Posy starts and when she's finished I might have my own children to be scared for," I said. " But I promise you'll be safe. You've only one slip. One out of ten thousand."

" How many have you got?" She asked. Thirty.

" A few, but I'll be fine as well. And so will Katniss," I said, as the door downstairs opened. " That's her now. Come on." I said, letting go of her, as she walked down ahead of me I tucked the back of her blouse into her skirt.

" I filled the tub for you," I said.

" Thanks," she said, before she went up the stairs.

The fewer I said to my sister before the reaping the better. She's scared, as she always is but she puts up a wall that's hard to break down.

I took out some bread and put it on a plate, it wasn't the best but the best was being left for this evening. I pulled two glasses on the table, each half full of sour milk from Lady.

I sat at the table with Prim and Mum opposite me. I could hear every second on the clock. Every second brought the reaping closer. It brought a chance of death.

Just before one we walked to the square, there were happy and colourful banners everywhere but no one was happy. How could you be happy?

It's the same every year: line up, get your finger pricked, go to your section and wait. That's the worst part. You're surrounded by people but without your family beside you, it's scary.

And then our escort, Effie Trinket, from the Capitol walked on to the stage at the front of the square. We are told about the Dark Days and our the glory of our country. And then it's time.

Effie Trinket walked to the bowl for the girls. I cross my fingers as she chooses a slip of paper. It takes a moment for me to realise the name she has called.

Prim.


	2. Chapter 2

Prim. Not Prim. She's too young. Too small. She'll never make it. It's my fault. I promised her she would be fine. My baby sister. She's only twelve. She couldn't die. I was supposed to take care of her. Protect her.

Volunteer. I could volunteer...

" I volunteer as tribute." I'm pulled from my thoughts. Was that me? No one was looking at me so it couldn't have been me. I pushed my way to the side of my section and saw Katniss standing between some peacekeepers with Prim clinging on to her. I ran to her and took her arms and tried to pulled her back.

" It's ok Prim. Come on," I whispered.

" Prim, go with Chryssie. Go find Mum," Katniss said.

" Katniss," she screamed through her tears.

" It's ok Prim," she said. Gale arrived beside us and lifted Prim to carry her away.

" Katniss," I whispered.

" Go," she said. I nodded and ran to the crowd where Mum was standing with Prim. I pushed her offered arm away and stood with my arms folded, staring at the stage.

" What's your name?" Effie asked. Katniss was paler now than she had been a few minutes ago, she was realising what she had done. That she had now given herself a possible death sentence.

" Katniss Everdeen."

" I bet my buttons that was your sister. And you didn't want her to have all the glory..." Prim's sobbing became louder. Being picked was not glory, it was the opposite. It was hell.

" Let's have a round of applause for District 12's first volunteer." The square was silent.

Very few people know Katniss and I but most people know of us. They feel sorry for the girl that they have seen in the Hob, the girl that supports her family. Maybe they knew our father and that's why they are silent.

Then someone raises three fingers in the air and then someone else does the same until everyone has their hand in the air, including me.

Kissing the fingers on your left hand raising them is an ancient District 12 custom, you only see it at funerals. It meant goodbye.

The boy tribute was then picked. Another sixteen year old, Peeta Mellark, his father owned the bakery. I think Katniss might have mentioned him once or twice. No one volunteered for him, his brother is my age but family ties don't count on reaping day. Except for us, what Katniss did was unheard of.

Before we can go the mayor has to read the Treaty of Treason, the same Treaty that we learn in school from age seven and therefore by seventeen know every word of it.

Finally, Katniss and Peeta shake hands and they are taken into the Justice Building.

" Will we go see her?" I asked Prim. She nodded and took my hand. She seemed younger than she was this morning. " Come on then," I said. We walked to the doors of the Justice Building and were told were Katniss was. I went to walk in with Mum and Prim but a peacekeeper held me back.

" Two at a time," he said. I nodded and moved away from the door.

She would be fine, we've grown up in the woods. She can hunt and swim and she can find fresh water and she can use a bow. She's fast and can climb trees.

" She'll be fine," I whispered.

" I know." I jumped at the voice and then glared at Gale.

" She has to be fine," I said.

" Don't worry about it yet," he said.

" You're done, how do you feel?" I asked.

" No different, never will," he said.

" Too many people to worry about," I said. The door opened and Prim and Mum walked out.

" We'll be outside," Mum said, looking at me. I nodded and walked into the room with Gale. I ran to Katniss and hugged her.

" You beat me to it," I said.

" You were going to volunteer?" She asked, surprised. I nodded and moved away to sit down.

" But you have more of a chance than I would have had," I said.

" No I don't," she said.

" Getting a knife should be easy but you need a bow," Gale said.

" What if there isn't one?" Katniss asked.

" Make one. A weak bow is better than none," he said.

" And if you show them how good you are there will be one," I added.

" What if there's no wood?" She asked.

" There's always wood," Gale said.

" It's not that exciting watching all the tributes freeze to death," I said.

" It's just hunting," he said.

" It's people," Katniss said.

" There's not much of a difference," he said.

" And humans are actually animals, so that should make it easier. In fact some animals are probably smarter than us," I said, and I saw the ghost of a smile on my sister's face before the door opened and the peacekeepers dragged us out. We walked back to the square in silence, Mum and Prim were talking to the Hawthornes.

" She's going now," I said.

" Chryssie!" Posy shouted, she reached up and I lifted her off the ground. " Can we go to the woods," she whispered in my ear.

" Not today pet, we'll go tomorrow and pick berries," I said.

" I want to go now," she said, frowning.

" We can't," I said. " But I've got a surprise for you at my house. Do you want it?"

" Yes. Mama, can I go with Chryssie?" She asked.

" Not today Posy. I'm sure the Everdeens want to be alone," Hazelle said.

" I'll take her straight home as soon as I give it to her. It's no trouble," I said.

" Please Mama?" Posy asked, she stared at her mother who eventually nodded. " Good. Lets go," the four year old said.

" I'll go on home then," I said to Prim and Mum.

" We'll be along," Mum said, and I nodded.

I carried Posy the whole way back, listening to her babble on about things.

" Will you teach me to swim?" She asked, as I set her down by the front door. I opened it and we walked inside. I took my bag from where I had left it earlier and looked inside. I pulled out the bundle of cookies and Posy clapped her hands. I handed her one and she smiled.

" Now about swimming. You're still too small, maybe next year," I said.

" Show me how to hunt then," she said, sitting on one of the chairs. I sat opposite her and shook my head.

" I can't hunt. We'll find something to do though," I said.

" Gale won't show me," she said.

" He doesn't want you to get hurt," I said.

" Why?" She asked, putting her half eaten cookie on the table and resting her head on her hands.

" Because he loves you and doesn't want you getting hurt," I said.

" Oh... Does he let you and Katniss get hurt?" She asked.

" We don't get hurt. We're experts," I said, with a laugh.

" What's that?" She asked.

" An expert? It's someone who is very good at their job," I said. She nodded, happy with my answer, and lifted her cookie again.

" Do you know everything Chryssie?" Her grey eyes looked up at me, even though she thought she knew the answer.

" No one can know everything," I replied. She smiled and shoved the last bit of cookie in her mouth before wiping her hands on her dress. " Do you want to take some home?"

" Yes. One for Vick, one for Rory and one for Gale," she said.

" How many is that?" I asked.

" One, two, three. Three cookies please," she said.

" Good girl," I said, lifting three and wrapping them in a bit of clean cloth before I got up. " Will we go now?" She nodded and stood up. She ran to me and grabbed my hand as Mum and Prim came in.

" I'm taking Posy home. I won't be long," I said. They nodded and I took Posy outside. We walked down the street to her house and at the gate she hugged me.

" I love you Chryssie," she said. I smiled and kissed the top of her head.

" I love you too pet. I'll see you tomorrow," I said, before she ran into the house.

I think Gale might be right, that she loves me more than him. I spend a lot of time with Posy, I always have. She's adorable.. Most of the time.


	3. Chapter 3

I put three plates of stew on the table. It looked strange, there should be four.

" Dinner," I called.

" Thank you dear," Mum said. I stood for a minute, waiting for Prim to come downstairs.

" I'll get her before her food gets cold," I said. I walked upstairs and saw Prim curled up in a ball on our mattress with Buttercup beside her. From the other side of the room I could hear her sobs. I walked over and sat on the mattress and pulled her into my arms.

" I miss Katniss," she cried.

" I know. I do too. We all do," I said, resting my head on top of hers.

" You didn't cry," she whispered. I haven't cried yet, I don't like people to see me crying. I'm the oldest. I'm not supposed to cry. I have to keep things together.

" She'll be back. I know she will," I said.

" What if she doesn't?" Prim asked.

" Don't think like that," I said.

" But..."

" No buts. Katniss will come home in a few weeks, I promise. But until then we have to get on with things. Alright?" I said and she nodded. " Good, now do you want some dinner."

" No thanks," she said.

" Didn't I just say that we had to get on with things?" I asked.

" I'm not hungry," she said.

" You'll be hungry later. Now come down and eat Prim," I said.

" I don't want to Chryssie," she said, looking up at me.

" Primrose Everdeen you have to eat," I said.

" I don't want to Chrysanthemum," she said, smiling. I smiled and stood up.

" Alright then," I said, grabbing her and throwing her over my shoulder.

" No. Chryssie. No. I'm sorry," she said, through her laughter. I put her down at the bottom of the stairs and we walked to the dinner table.

* * *

><p><p>

_" And the female tribute for the 75th Hunger Games is Chryssie Everdeen." _

_Me. No, it can't be me. I can't die. I'm not a tribute. I can't be picked. _

_" I volunteer." Prim walked on to the stage. _

_" No Prim. No," I screamed. _

_" And the male tribute is Gale Hawthorne." _

_" No. Don't leave me. Don't go," I screamed. The figures were pulled away from me. _

" Chryssie. Chryssie? You're alright. It was just a nightmare. Just a bad dream."

I opened my eyes, and it was dark the only light was coming from a candle. Mum wiped my eyes with her hand.

" It was just a bad dream," she whispered, holding my hand. She was sitting on the bed beside me. I shuffled closer and she wrapped her arms around me for the first time in years. " It's over now. It was just a dream. Everything's alright."

" They took everyone. Everyone was going to die except me. Prim volunteered for me and Gale was reaped and Katniss wasn't there. It's all my fault."

" Shush now. It's not your fault," Mum whispered, rubbing my back.

" It is. They know I steal. That's why Prim was chosen," I cried.

" No it's not. The paper is in the bowl at random. It's not your fault," Mum said, trying to dry my eyes with her hand.

" Katniss is going to be ok," Prim said. I nodded and pulled my legs to my chest.

" I'm fine. Go back to sleep," I said.

" Are you sure?" Mum asked. I nodded and she stood and walked to her own mattress. Prim rolled over on our mattress and hooked her arms around one of my legs.

They both fell asleep quickly. I didn't. Every time I closed my eyes I saw Katniss covered in blood or Prim being beheaded.

I sat there for hours, staring into the darkness of the room. I only moved when the sun began to rise. I unlatched Prim's hands from my leg and got up. I got dressed quickly and carried my boots downstairs and put them on at the front door. Then I ran, I ran through the meadow and ducked under the fence and then through the forest. I stopped in the centre and sat down on a log.

It was different sitting here. I could imagine that Katniss was still here and that she'd appear from within the trees in a few minutes holding a squirrel. But that wasn't going to happen for a long time.


	4. Chapter 4

I stood up and decided to focus on something else. I walked back to the edge of the forest and pulled my knife from where it was hidden in a tree. I walked along the familiar paths, not bothering to check the snares. That could be done later. I went to the clearing and sat down. I wondered what Katniss was doing, I'm sure she'll be fine but I'm scared.

" Out early Chryssie." I nodded.

" I don't think I slept last night," I said. I turned and looked up at Gale. " She'll be alright, won't she?"

" She'll win. She has to win," he said, sitting beside me.

" I want her home. I want her safe. Why didn't I volunteer? I should have volunteered. It's my fault," I said, putting my head in my hands.

" It's not your fault, and Katniss wouldn't have let you volunteer. In three weeks she will come home and you'll all move into a fancy house in Victors Village," he said, putting his arm around my shoulder.

" I don't want to watch this year. I don't want to see her die, or go mad. I want to remember Katniss as my sister, not as a murderer," I said.

" She'll be the same when she comes home Chryssie," he said.

" No she won't. No victor is the same. Think about it, they're alcoholics and recluses and insane!" I said, my mind was spinning with thoughts of Katniss and what would happen to her.

" Chryssie. Chryssie. Stop," Gale said, shaking me gently. I nodded and looked at him. " You shouldn't think the worst."

" I know, but I can't help it," I said, with a sigh.

" The letter came this morning. They want me to start next month," he said.

" I'm not working in the mines," I said. " I don't like small spaces and I don't like the idea of being trapped down there."

" I wish we could spend all day here. That's what would happen if we ran away," Gale said. I rolled my eyes, he had been talking about running away for years and never did it.

" Do you think we could do it?" I asked. Gale nodded. " But there's so many of us."

" As long as we have food, water and shelter," he said.

" Shelter. That's the hardest," I said.

" A few tents?" Gale suggested. I nodded.

" I wish I could go back to yesterday morning. We could have ran," I said.

" They would have found us if we went yesterday," he said. " They check us, remember?" I nodded.

" I hate this place. I hate living here. There must be somewhere better, everyone living here grows up scared of dying," I said.

" We should find it," Gale said.

" I just don't believe that all of those old countries don't exist anymore and Panem is the only place left," I said.

" You're probably right. Did you check the snares?" Gale asked.

" No," I replied.

" Let's go then," he said. We both stood up and walked back through the trees, finding rabbits and other animals that got caught in the snares. Then we went back through the fence and towards the Hob.

" Hi Gale." We both turned when we heard a voice. It came from in front of the old house beside the Hob. It was a girl in Gale's year in school, her name was Winnie.

" Come in, I'll treat you for free. I'm sure you need it now that your girlfriend's dead," she said, she walked down the steps towards us and smiled at Gale, completely ignoring me. I looked her up and down. She was wearing what looked like a large belt that didn't cover any of what were supposed to be her private parts.

I didn't understand why people assumed that Katniss and Gale were together, they were more like brother and sister than a couple. I could see it clear as day but Gale thought the opposite, he had told me he liked her. And Katniss, well Katniss is never going to fall in love with anyone. She's that sort of person.

" I've things to do," Gale muttered, walking away, as fast as he could. I followed him and was practically running to keep up with him.

" You complain when I steal. Would you prefer it if I did that?" I asked, with a grin.

" Steal as much as you want," he said. " Do you need anything?"

" Just the usual," I said, as we walked into the Hob.


	5. Chapter 5

For the next few days we tried to get on with our lives, we hunted and sold. I slipped unnoticed into some of the bigger house in town and took bits of food. The rest of the time we walked or were glued to the set, even though Katniss wouldn't be in the Capitol yet. It only got worse when we started seeing her on the television. It didn't seem like her, I thought it seemed like she had already given up. No one in the Capitol would help her because of the way she was acting. We watched the interviews, where Katniss simply answered questions, I could see she was trying, the thing that would really get her sponsors would be her clothing. She looked amazing, finally District 12 got a good stylist and Katniss was clearly an icon already. The girl on fire.

The boy Peeta, I knew him from being in the bakery, I knew he liked Katniss. That would get them some help, but she wouldn't be happy with it.

When they went into the Games I sat by the television all day, every day. I just wanted to make sure she was alright. I don't think it was too much to ask.

I saw her on her own and then with the little girl who was so much like Prim. I heard the announcement about two victors winning and I saw her run to find Peeta. She liked him more than she knew, it was the things she was doing, I don't think it was just for the cameras, Katniss wasn't that fake and she was an awful actor. When we were little I was the one who had to lie about things.

* * *

><p><p>

I sat cross-legged on the grass with the dead rabbit on my lap, with my knife I cut off it's head and then skinned it.

" You're back," Gale said.

" Mum wouldn't let me watch anymore. She said I needed a break," I answered, not looking up.

" Do you believe it?" He asked.

" I'm not sure. She's not a good liar," I said.

" So you think she likes him then?" He asked, staring into the lake.

" Possibly," I answered. He didn't reply and I looked at him. " Why don't you start a fire? We can have rabbit for lunch." Gale nodded and grabbed some sticks.

" I think you should give up on her," I said, after a few minutes.

" Why?" He asked, looking up from the pile of sticks.

" If they both come out they'll be expected to get married. They're 'star-crossed lovers'. If she comes out she'll never get to make another decision for herself," I said.

" Katniss won't like that and they don't have to keep it up," Gale said. So he was going to keep trying, even though he'd never succeed.


	6. Chapter 6

"I can't see anything!" Prim said, standing on her toes, trying to see over the crowd. Obviously being the family of one of the victors didn't give us special privileges. We were stuck in the middle of the crowd that was waiting at the station to welcome Katniss and Peeta home.

"Don't worry, we'll hear the train before we see it," I said.

"But I want to see," Prim said.

"Okay then," Gale said. He picked her up and put her on his shoulders. She laughed and smiled down at me.

"Careful Prim," Mum said, looking at her. Prim nodded and pulled on Gale's ears giggling.

"Hey! Stop it!" He said, grabbing one of her hands.

It was nice to see Prim so happy, she had been so quiet the last few weeks. Now Katniss was coming home and our family would be back to normal.

The train pulled into the station and I could see Katniss and Peeta get off. They waved and smiled at the crowd and then she walked towards us. I hugged her first.

"How do you feel, victor? I'm glad you're home. I've missed you," I said.

"I've missed you too Chryssie," Katniss said. I nodded and smiled at her, she didn't look any different, maybe just a little tired.

"We can talk properly later, you've a lot of people to say hello to," I said, and she moved over to help Prim off Gale's shoulders.

* * *

><p><p>

"I still can't believe it. My sister the winner of the Hunger Games," I said, as we finished packing away the things from our house in the Seam.

"I know. I didn't think I would come back," Katniss said.

"I did. You're a fighter Kat. You always have been. If anyone was going to do it, it was going to be you," I said.

"I couldn't have done it alone," she said. I put the last of the cutlery in a basket and looked at my sister, who was taking books off our only bookshelf.

"So what do you do next?" I asked.

"Forget."

"About Peeta?"

"Nothing happened. It was only for the games."

"Katniss, he clearly has feelings for you if he announced it on national television," I said.

"He thought it would get sponsors," she replied.

"So you don't like him at all?" I asked. She didn't reply. "You cared too much about him in the arena to have no feelings for him."

She continued putting things into her bag, ignoring me.

"Everyone here believed it. Even Gale thinks you love him."

"I'm going," she said, walking towards the door.

"Be careful or someone will get hurt," I said, but she didn't hear me as the door swung shut.

I looked around our house. I had always lived here, it would be strange living in Victor's Village. It would be quieter, they wouldn't be any neighbours and we wouldn't be as close to the meadow. But the air would be cleaner and things would get covered in coal dust.

I took Dad's photograph from it's place on the windowsill and placed it on top of the basket that I was taking to the new house.


End file.
